While this new wave of sex is a solo act, in some cases, it can encourage communication between partners. “There are instances in which virtual sex is helpful because some people work up the courage to speak to their mate about something that arouses them that they found online, that they have not been able to talk about before,” says Weston.“Sometimes, though, the virtual sex draws a person away from their partner. While the former does happen, it’s the latter that probably happens more often.” Creativity May Boost Sexual Activity Changes in Sexual Communication For those who meet in the online world -- something that is as commonplace today as meeting in a smoky bar -- maybe virtual sex provides an opportunity to open doors that were previously closed.He posed questions like, how many times a week do you have sex? We knew it would be high, given that students were filling this survey anonymously and as such would feel comfortable being truthful about their sexual habits.” Gurza was surprised to find 50 percent wasn’t even close.“Eighty-seven percent having had virtual sex was astonishing to us, but upon reflection it is very much a testament to the demographic we are dealing with,” says Gurza, of the 18- to 22-year-olds who responded to the survey -- many of whom grew up in an online world.Anytime you prefer to have online sex to actual human company -- a friend calls you up and asks you to dinner and you choose not to go because you’d rather engage in online sex -- that’s when you're headed for trouble.” Cheating Online And then, of course, comes the question that’s as old as the Internet -- is online sex cheating?“When one person in a marriage is going to the Internet to get sex, it erodes the intimacy in the marriage,” says Berman.Many virtual connections are just precursors for the real thing and as such, this initial openness might lead to increased openness when the sexual deed occurs -- this is a good thing.” It’s easy to access, you can do it in the privacy of your own home, it’s free (or at least cheap), and you can do it as often as you want -- morning, noon, and night. Prescriptions for Sexual Frustration Intimacy Issues “A lot of people are engaging in Internet sex,” says Jenn Berman, Ph D, a psychologist in private practice in Los Angeles who specializes in family and marriage counseling.“But for people who are doing it regularly or are substituting their intimate relationships for online sex, we’re talking about people who have intimacy issues.” By consistently choosing a computer over the real deal -- whether it’s for sex or for human interaction in general -- one can sense the problems that might arise.
“And so each relationship defines it on their own terms.“When you are using a long-distance method to achieve sexual intimacy with a stranger who you never get to know, you are not achieving true intimacy,” says Berman.“And if you are using that on a regular basis, it’s preventing you from getting sexual and emotional intimacy in your life.“One can almost say that there has been a technological sexual revolution,” says Gurza.“With every new advent in technology, virtual sex evolves.” “Cell phone text sex is also changing the rules, as it makes it transportable, and can be done from anywhere, not having to be confined in front of a desktop,” Gurza tells Web MD.