A good rule of thumb: if you aren’t available for a date within 7 days of sending the message, don’t send it.
NOT-SO-SMOOTH OPERATOR The scenario: “I recently received a message that said, ‘Damn you’re a pretty white girl, you into muscular black men?
A lot of you are self-conscious about the fact that you’re on a dating site.
But obviously if she’s on the site too, you’re both in the same boat.
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When I look in the mirror, for the most part, I like what I see.
I like my curves, I like ass, I like my legs, I like my boobs (which I only have in abundance, when I’m tipping the scales), and I like my face.
If you really are going away, wait until you get back to ask her out.
But the fact remains that I’m a short, dark-skinned, fat Black girl, with a natural.
I’m all those things in a culture that not only hates fat, and finds it repulsive, but also in a culture where fat dark-skinned women can only find roles in movies as maids.
There’s obviously a reason she didn’t think it would work out, so why keep trying to pursue someone who is clearly not interested in you?
Instead, channel your energy into meeting someone else. A general rule: once you’ve sent four messages back and forth, someone should ask someone out — preferably the man. [pagebreak] PRESSURE COOKERThe scenario: “I was really into someone I went on a few dates with, until he told me he was taking down his online dating profile and he wanted me to do the same.” — Jess, 34 The problem..the solution: Nothing will scare a girl faster than putting that kind of pressure on her too early into the relationship.